What I thought I could do, I really couldn’t do.

Thought I had shoulders that supported others.
Thought if I pushed harder, I’d become stronger.
If I tried more, I’d be more successful.
If I did better, things would be better.

Oh, how blind I was.

I was in rough waters trying to paddle against the current, hitting ever rock.

Thankfully,
I eventually fell out, whilst wondering in my state if I was going to drown a fellow paddler passed by, fortunately he was gifted at seeing what in my blinded state I couldn’t

He threw me a lifeline with his advice, that my battling was caused by my decisions and beliefs.

He showed me
That I couldn’t take the weight of others
If I pushed harder, I would burn my flame out
It I tried harder, the walls would just get stronger.
If I did better, I wouldn’t be the perfect me as I was now.

I needed to protect and nourish myself

I just needed to rest
And simplify
To be still
Say No,
indulge my hearts desires
And create life easier

The fellow traveller said all I required to do was to SHINE, that was the only important thing to do, then everything else would just fall into place.

So moral of my story is.. if you are mentally or emotionally hurting/pushing yourself, you’re light starts to dim out (illness then strikes) the most important thing you must remember is that everything depends on you understanding that self nurturing doesn’t take second place.

So be smart and make life easier, flow instead of swimming against the current.

Kazia

 

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